How to Stop Feeling Insecure

Feeling insecure about yourself is a normal part of life. It happens to everyone. However, chronic feelings of insecurity can take a toll on every aspect of your life and sabotage your success. So, how can you stop feeling insecure and boost your confidence?

There are many reasons why insecurities come about. It could be from your early life experiences or the kind of people you surround ourselves with. Insecurities can also stem from a traumatic event, a crisis such as a divorce or a loss.

It is very important that you deal with these feelings and stop feeling insecure as it can hold you back from success.

Here are some tips that can help you:

Recognize that it is normal to feel insecure

Do not beat yourself up about having negative emotions and feeling insecure. Recognize that it’s very normal. Pretty much everyone has some type of insecurity that they are struggling with. It may range from bad acne, weight, height, body features, the way they talk etc.

 Recognizing that it is normal to feel this way and it is more common than you think will help you to focus on what you can do to change it.

There is no reason for you to feel down about your insecurities. Rather do a self-analysis of what could be making you feel bad and deal with it.

Write it down so you can put it into perspective. Deal with it honestly and thoroughly so that you can be able to move forward.

 Get rid of people that make you feel bad about yourself

Sometimes insecurities come about because you are looking at yourself from the perspective of someone else, perhaps a person with no appreciation of your talents, positive traits and abilities.

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 You may tend to judge yourself harshly according to that person’s view. This might result in a lowered self-esteem and confidence.

  So, if you have a friend who’s always bringing you down, or constantly pointing out your flaws , it might be time to distance yourself from them.

It is much better to surround yourself with people that are supportive of you in an honest and healthy way, cheer you on and genuinely want to see you win.

Constantly cheer yourself up

Whenever you start feeling insecure and experience dark feelings, it’s usually because something is off. Identify your triggers quickly, address them and then begin to cheer yourself up. 

For example, if you have a work presentation, instead of telling yourself all the things that could go wrong with it and feeling nervous, begin to hype yourself up. Don’t wait for others to tell you it’s going to be okay. Tell yourself of all the reasons why you will nail it. You are great. You are qualified. You got it.

Remember that the greatest relationship you will ever have in this life is the relationship you have with yourself. Build it. Strengthen it.Tend to maintain your belief in your awesomeness because when you feel consistently terrible, the world suffers and you do too.

Be Patient with yourself

Overcoming insecurity is a journey which can never happen overnight. So be patient with yourself.

 You can start making progress by taking baby steps to build up your confidence and push yourself out of your comfort zone.

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An article by Amy Morin on suggested to be realistic about your expectations. “Of course there will be times when your emotions get the best of you, times when you believe thoughts that aren’t true, and times when you engage in self-destructive behaviour. But these times will grow fewer and farther when you are actively working to build mental health”.

So, take your time and be patient with yourself. Also, remember that progress will not come in a straight graph. When you constantly work on yourself, you will eventually be able to fight off most of your insecurities.

 Treat yourself kindly

Start to treat yourself more positively and kindly. When you do this consistently, you begin to experience more self-belief, confidence and happiness.

Learn to notice when you are being critical of yourself and to immediately stop it.

Take compliments to heart, no matter how trivial they may seem.

Carve out some time for yourself everyday to do something that brings you joy.

Forgive yourself when you have made some mistakes.

Everyday, reflect on at least 3 good things that you love about yourself.

 Give yourself a hand

On your journey to heal your insecurities, celebrate your wins no matter how small. The journey is not easy so go ahead and give yourself a hand.

Recognizing and celebrating your small wins is a very powerful motivator. Small wins can make you feel like you are actually making progress.  This will boost your self-esteem and motivate you to do even better.

You can celebrate how far you have come in overcoming your insecurities by writing it down, telling a trusted partner, rewarding yourself with your favorite things and expressing gratitude.

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Applying the above suggestions will help you stop feeling insecure and boost your self-esteem and confidence.

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